Right now, you’re probably asking yourself two things:
Who am I?
And,
what the hell are you doing here?
Let’s start with the most obvious question, shall we?
You’re here, ladies, because you can’t f*ck.
Oh, stop it. Don’t cringe. No one under the age of 80 clutches their pearls.You might as well get used to it, because for the next six weeks, you’re going to hear that word a lot. And you’re going to say it a lot. Go ahead, try it out on your tongue.
F*ck. F***ck.
Ok, good. Now where were we?
If you enrolled yourself in this program then you are wholly aware that you’re a lousy lay. Good for you. Admitting it is half the battle.
For those of you that have been sent here by your husband or significant other, dry your tears and get over it. You’ve been given a gift, ladies. The gift of mind-blowing, wall-climbing, multiple-orgasm-inducing sex. You have the opportunity to f*ck like a porn star. And I guarantee, you will when I’m done with you.
And who am I?
Well, for the next six weeks, I will be your lover, your teacher, your best friend, and your worst enemy.
Your every-f*cking-thing. I’m the one who is going to save your relationship and your sex life.
I am Justice Drake.
And I turn housewives into whores.
Now…who’s first?
Hmm. How do I start this review, because even if
I’ve read this a few days ago, I still can’t seem to express how much I liked it.
:D
I saw this book from a blogger friend in facebook
who seem to have an addiction with one-clicking, so I decided to check it out
on Goodreads. Reading the synopsis is all the motivation I needed to also get
my own copy. Plus it definitely isn’t that hard to imagine Justice Drake’s
character. Just look at the book cover. Oh my. I think he may have caused me to
swoon just a little. Haha.
Then there’s the entire plot. It’s something new to
read – a new twist to the New Adult Novels.
Taint is the story of Justice Drake and Allison
Elliot-Carr. Both are known personalities in their own way. Justice is the
mysterious Sex Doctor who caters to Hollywood Celebrities, while Allison is a
daughter of two famous personalities – one of whom is the owner of one of the
largest investment banks in the world. Ally is married to the trust fund baby
who is also known as a philandering husband by many, Evan Carr. No one among
them figured out that the decision they made will throw them all together in
one extreme scandal.
“I’m
going to teach you how to fuck your husband.”
For some men, they might find Justice Drake’s job
as the best job in the world. He caters to high profile clients most of the
time and all he needs to teach them is s*x education. All the wives that are
enrolled to his school are sent to an undisclosed location where they could
have no contact with the outside world for six weeks. As brutal, as it may
seem, it’s purely sex education without the practical examination. Justice,
together with some experts in the arena, demonstrates and explains the basic
necessities that are to be expected from wives. He believes that one of the
main reasons why husbands wanders off is because wives doesn’t pleasure them
enough.
Patience is
key in my profession. Most days, I feel more like an overworked, underpaid
daycare provider than a…lifestyle…coach.
Same, same.
Justice started out as somewhat of an a**hollish
person. He doesn’t sugar coat his words and most of the time it comes out as
rude. He doesn’t consider how her clients might feel. He loves to make the
squirm, embarrassed until they turn a beet red, he loves to make them
speechless and sometimes lessens the self-esteem of his clients.
It's like
that zombie romance movie, as ridiculous as it sounds. The more I hang around
Allison, the more alive I feel. The dark coldness of my heart begins to heat
and bloom into something vital, and for once, I feel…normal. Like somehow, I
belong.
But there was someone among the participants who
was brave enough to raise her opinions regarding his curriculum. Here comes
Allison. The woman who was just a shell of what she usually was. Tainted by her
experience with his husband, who chose to send her to study her sensuality,
than fix their crashing marriage. Because of her tactlessness, she got her way
into Drake’s conscience. And with the time they bonded together during the
night, she managed to capture Drake’s interest. They didn’t know when, but
somewhere along the way, they developed feelings towards one another.
I’m a lot of
things– crass, stubborn, brutally honest, egotistical– but one thing I am not,
is careless. I know my boundaries, and I never cross them. In a business where
lines can be easily blurred, those boundaries are outlined in black Sharpie,
traced in gasoline, then set the fuck on fire, ensuring that no one even gets
close enough to inhale the fumes of temptation.
Yet, here I
am, touching, tempting, testing the limits. Begging to get burned by an angel
with a halo of fire.
But then, Drake knows something that might destroy
how she will perceive him and this might break the precious thing that’s
happening between them. Though he wanted to reveal his real identity to her, he
knows it will destroy her. He never expected to fall for someone like her. He avoided
to initiate or encourage any relationship between him and a client, but Ally is
different. He felt alive again after a long time. How could he possibly give
her up? He knows what her husband is doing behind her back. He’s capable of
giving her more. But would she possibly choose him? Evan has everything. And
even though, he wanted to believe that she also has feelings for him, he is not
quite sure if her feelings for her are stronger that what she feels for Evan.
I want to
breathe. I want to inhale her in every way possible. I want her life to sustain
me, her heartbeat to synchronize with mine.
But I don’t
want to taint her. I don’t want her to be like me. A cheater. A deviant. An
outcast. She deserves better, and I’m not better. Not better than what she
already has, which is Evan.
I really feel Justice. He masks his vulnerability
behind his crude reputation. He is still that humiliated kid who was kicked out
of his house and his school, because he was a bastard. He is still that
uncertain kid who was not accepted in the society. And all that he did during
his self-exile was a way to rebel against the rules of society.
The ending was good. They got to have their
happily-ever-after. They managed to win the media and be accepted by the
society.
Overall, Taint was such a refreshing story. It was
fun. All the necessary elements are there – hot couple, great hot scenes,
beautiful plot and cover and interesting story with a little bit of drama,
angst, comedy and a full plate of romance.
“UNLESS HE’S COMPLETELY desperate or under the
influence, a man can’t—and won’t—fuck what doesn’t get him hard.”
Listen up, ladies. We’re fucking tired! You try
going jackrabbit-style, throw in some Cirque du Soleil moves and see if you can
keep your eyelids peeled. Us passing out after sex is a compliment—a testament
to how good it was. And quite frankly, if your dude can hop out of the sack and
go to work or run a marathon, then he still has energy left for sex. He’s just
done having sex with you.
“THERE’S ONE THING that a man wants you to
stroke more than his cock: his ego. Throw in the money and power, and you’ve
got a Hulk-size ego that needs to be fed around the clock.”
“Men are like children. They constantly need
positive reinforcement. And if they don’t get that, they settle for negative
reinforcement.”
Life is just a series of choices. We try to
always make the best ones, but really we’re just settling for the lesser of two
evils. Or at least trying to.
"So...if
you had to give up one, would you rather sacrifice your sight or your
hearing?" She asks, going in for more.
"That's
an easy one. Hearing. I'd definitely give up my hearing if I had to."
"Explain
your case, sir."
"Well,
for one, you can still communicate even if you're deaf. You can sign or read
lips. And let's face it—we live in the age of excessive technology. I could
just text or Instagram you."
"Yeah,
but you'd never hear music. You'd never get to hear a child's laughter or the
sound of someone saying, "I
love you." You'd miss out on so much."
I look at
her, seeing her. Trying to make her see me. "But to not be able to see a
pink sunset fade to purple or a million stars in the sky, stretching to
eternity...you can't manufacture that. Technology can't create a smile so
bright that it makes you smile even when you don't want to. It can't manipulate
true beauty. It can try, but it'll never duplicate that exact shade of red,
fiery hair. Or the pattern of cinnamon freckles on your nose. Or even the way
your eyes change from blue to green like a mood ring. You can't forge what has
been perfectly designed. That kind of beauty doesn't require sound or words or
even music. It doesn't need anything else. Anything more and it would overwhelm
you."
“Meh. I mean,
don’t get me wrong, it’s pretty good. But sex is just… I don’t know. Just sex. I get why people enjoy it so
much, but I just don’t understand why we give it so much power. It’s a
physical act of love or affection, not love or affection itself. Relationships
are about so much more than sex. It’s about trust, loyalty, honesty, kindness,
respect—all things that don’t require a woman to spread her legs.”
“I agree that
all of those elements are necessary and required in a relationship, but to be
honest, it all leads to sex. You see, we’re sweet and funny and kind because we
want sex. We sit through chick flicks, the theater and ballet because we want
sex. We wait patiently as you try 83 variations of a black peep-toe pump
because we want sex…while you wear the shoes.
“Think of it
this way: trust, honesty, respect…all those things are like the playoffs during
football season. You need to play them. They’re necessary to get you to where
you want to be—the Super Bowl. Sex is the Super Bowl, Ally. And while those
playoff games may have gotten you there, they really can’t win the game for
you. No one says, “They played
great in that game a few weeks ago, so it’s ok that they’re losing now.” It’s
how you play the game that day
that matters. That’s the only thing people care about.”
You’re worth
it. I’ll gladly stay broken for you.
Quirky Phoebe
is comforting Ross, telling him to hang in there because no matter what, Rachel
is his lobster. And once lobsters meet and fall in love, they mate for life.
They always find each other. And sooner or later, Rachel and Ross will be
together.
Military wife, mother of 3 boys, and author of The Dark Light Series & Fear of Falling
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